Yesterday, I hit rock bottom.
Needless to say that a side effect of not being able to keep anything down means my anti-depressants don't have a chance to absorb.
I struggled for the past 2 weeks, but yesterday was my breaking point. Anxiety at an all time high, the irrational part of my head telling me my boss would sack me for being sick, telling myself that I am always sick and it's not good enough, no one else gets sick - it's only me, that I'm a failure as a parent, a wife, a home maker and a person in general.
Yeah - it was a 'great' day.
I managed to schlep myself to the GP and sob away in her office. I give the woman credit for being able to decipher what I was saying through all the sobbing and sniffling.
So here I am, fresh from an uninterrupted, anti-depressant absorbing, nausea free nights sleep, thanks to a high dose of Vitamin B6.
Oh B6 - I wish I knew about you sooner. I know we'll be the best of friends and you can consider yourself added to the Christmas Card list, Easter gift list, Birthday acknowledgement list and any other important list I create that you could be logically included.
I had forgotten how something as simple as an uninterrupted nights sleep can make me feel a lot more together. The Man also took Miss 3 to daycare today so I have an entire day to myself - I can sleep, watch TV, sleep a bit more and, most excitingly, HAVE SOMETHING TO EAT!!
I am loving life today. And it makes me kick myself that I didn't say something sooner - but I don't like feeling as though I'm wasting the GPs time. There are people with serious illness or chronic disease that need a GP appointment more than me. My situation always feels so insignificant.
However, today I am focusing on the good and enjoying the fact that I feel far more human than I did 24 hours ago.
Hooray for Vitamn B6!!