The Acidic Observer - The Home Edition

It's been a while since the last Acidic Observer, and for that I'm sorry. I have been quietly swallowing my burning views, instead of ranting about them here, like a sanctioned looney.

Thankfully, that mistake is being rectified as of now. And my aim, this week? The Darwin Housing Market.

The Man and I have been looking at building a new home over the past few weeks - probably a more sensible use of our time would have been investigating the value of internal organs on the black market.

Darwin property is at a peak, right now. To be honest we were lucky to have been able to buy a house when we did, back in 2010. Since then, the cost of property has skyrocketed. Why? Because of the Itchy Project! Well, it's actually the ICHTHYS Project, but calling it the Itchy Project makes me feel better.

It's all about gas mining and other boring stuff. Well there's more to it, but I'm just not that interested. Darwin was expensive enough without this sudden influx of interest - and while I'm sure local business, and not forgetting local developers, are loving the boom - the rest of us aren't!

Well, not me, anyway.

I also blame the state and local Governments for being so greedy that they release land in pissy amounts, driving up the price as people compete to be the newest owner of a fucking postage stamp.

I'm sorry, but when land is costing the same amount as the home we want to build, I kinda lose my shit.

And when I say kinda, I mean I morph into a wolverine and rip the head off of any unsuspecting realtor/developer who might enquire as to whether we are interested in purchasing this block before anyone else does. Even though we'd be lucky to fit a garden shed on it!

Trust me when I say that those who are renting are being shafted left, right   and centre, too. People/investors/greedy fucking bastards know they can make money from the influx of new employees of Itchy who need a home for their families. So what do they do? Up the rent to a bonkers level, dump the current tenants who can no longer afford it, and happily give it to a mining exec and their family who can afford $800+ a week because they're not paying for it. Gina Reinhardt is!

Well, maybe not Gina - but you get the idea.

Of course, just to really rub salt into the wound, I'm dumb enough to go onto realestate.com and look at the cost of building new in our hometown, in SA. Cue complete fucking meltdown as I ask the gods to strike down every single person in the NT who is contributing to the demented costing factor of a home.

I feel like for the prices we're looking at, we should be living in Sydney or Melbourne. Next door to Hugh Jackman. With Nicole, Keith, Sunday Roast and...and...the other ones on the other side. We're not looking for sea views, we're not looking for 3 hectares and some livestock. It's Darwin, people! You know, the place where mangoes cost $4 each and are brought in from Queensland, even though there are mango farms down the road. Where diesel is 20-50 cents a litre more than anywhere else...everything takes twice as long and is twice the price because of 'shipping', and then when the Ghan derails (again) it means the shops start advising us that stock will be low and we will have to make our own deodorant and toilet paper until the train can get here again.

IT'S DARWIN! We don't have a single department store. Even Freedom Furniture abandoned us!

We only have 1 power and water supplier which is Government owned. But our power systems haven't been maintained properly so now the prices are increasing by 15% so the Government can afford to upgrade and bring Darwin out of the middle ages so the power won't drop out when a gerbil on a treadmill gets struck by lightening.

The Darwin City Council slogs you $40 parking fines for being over your time limit in street parking - for the privilege of parking under a fucking frangipani tree where the flowers glue themselves to your car when it rains and secrete this disgusting white milky stuff everywhere. And then, of course, the bats shit all over your car. And then the rain clouds part and bake it all into the paint of your car so it needs to be re-done every 2 years.

The housing situation is just one more tooth in the cog of 'what the fuck, Darwin!?'.

It's all so painfully typical, I have no idea why I even get shitty anymore.

I'd say it was hope that makes me think things will change - but really, it's denial. And it get's me through, until we want to move on with our lives.

So overall, screw you Itchy, screw you Government and, today, screw you Darwin.

You are all on my shit list until further notice, Or I win the lottery.

Then I'm gonna move in next to Hugh.

The Acidic Observer, The 'What the Fuck, Universe!?' Edition

This week The Acidic Observer comes courtesy of my own life.

There will be swearing, irrational problem solving and more swearing.

They are 100% First World problems, but they are shitting me to tears so I am going to bitch about them here.

Because if I can't bitch on my own blog, then what the hell is the point??

For starters, Power and Water are on my shit list. They are at an all time high on my shit list, in fact. Why? Well, in my experience, when you send out an amendment to a power bill that shows your bill is well and truly covered and you have a surplus to carry over to the next quarter and then the next week you send those same people an ACCOUNT for $1,300 for the same quarter you just told them was paid for - you're going to end up on someone's shit list.

And, frankly, they should be grateful not to be on my 'hit and run list'.

Then the pool man knocks on the door. He's checked on the leak from the pool pump we were talking about, and it's not the 'o' ring.

No, of course it's not the 'o' ring - why would it be something that could be solved for under $10!

The entire fucking sand filter has split, and to make it even better we can't claim it under the 10 year warranty because the pool and equipment came with the house when we bought it, and the warranty isn't transferable.

Are you shitting me!!? Fine, there's another $1,200.

Although I've been wondering how much it would cost just to fill the stupid thing in. I may have mentioned this solution to The Man...

Finally, I wake up this morning and flick on the news only to find the TV in the lounge room has a massive red strip of pixels down one side of the screen.

Yep - thanks Universe - fuck you too.

On the bright side, this irritating shit happens in 3's, yes? So we're done. For now, at least.

Power and Water seem to want money every 3 months.

Bastards.

We really need to invest in a generator.


 

Pregnancy, Construction & iPhones on a FFS!? Friday...

Oh Friday - I love you. You herald the beginning of another week in this pregnancy and one less week for everything to be done that I've decided MUST be done before this baby arrives.

Good times.

But let's cut to the chase, shall we?

• My self esteem is at an all time low when it comes to my appearance. So when The Man happens to mention that a model in an underwear advert reminds him of his brother's wife, my ground level self esteem begins to dig a tunnel to the centre of the earth...FFS
• He tried to make me feel better by saying it was the models face that reminded him of his SIL- it had nothing to do with her body. But we all know the more you explain, the worse it gets...FFS
• When The Man and his brother were demolishing part of the house, they managed to have an entire section of wall bring my laptop, crashing to the ground, with it...FFS
• Missed The Man's computer by a mile, of course...FFS
• Miss 3 has managed to lose her iPod. I know it must be in the house but I can't find it and it means my phone is often recruited as a replacement. I only discover this fact after she's gone to bed and I find my flat phone buried in the couch...FFS
• I'm sure my friends must think I'm a rude bitch for not answering my phone or replying to messages...FFS
• Miss 3 doesn't bother with The Man's phone. Only mine...FFS
• The Man, his brother and a carpenter mate are completing the walls to the new baby's room tomorrow. I have an impending sense of doom about the idea of nail guns being used...FFS
• Perhaps this is because they are the most accident prone people alive, especially when together...FFS
• I also keep having premonitions of a visit to the emergency room...FFS
• I found some awesome maternity clothes in the newest Big W catalogue. But I forgot that I live in Darwin and the idea that I could buy something advertised is completely ludicrous...FFS
• The OB has me on maternity leave because I need to be able to rest a lot to allow my ribs to heal. Not sure how that's meant to work when I have a baby using them as monkey bars...FFS
• And just in case my life sounds far too glamorous, the all-the-time-sickness hasn't gone. I had to throw up in my handbag the other day...FFS
• This awesome retching also does nothing for the rib situation...FFS
• I've developed a disturbing addiction to pancakes. This does not bode well for my plan of minimal weight gain in this pregnancy...FFS
• My nesting is in full swing and it's turning me into a nut job. But it's not my fault, THE HOUSE AND EVERYTHING AROUND IT IS JUST SO DISORGANISED!!...FFS
• The biggest issue is that as soon as I've put something away, I can't remember where I put it. Such as my house keys or my child...FFS

So there you go...now if you'll excuse me I have to go clean all the things I cleaned yesterday and put things away in the hope that I'll remember where I put them.

March Photo A Day: Day 18...

Day 17

| A Corner of My Home |

But I chose 2 because they are both important. Although my blogging corner will have to relocate and a new wall will have to go in as we need the 3rd bedroom back...

Want to play along? Visit www.fatmumslim.com.au for all the details

March Photo A Day: Day 9...

Day 9

| Red |

I love having red in the house.

Want to play along? Visit www.fatmumslim.com.au for all the details

March Photo A Day: Day 8...

Day 8

| Window |

The best view in the house is from the Master Bedroom window.

Want to play along? Visit www.fatmumslim.com.au for all the details

March Photo A Day: Day 1...

Day 1

| Up |

I greatly dislike the roman blinds in our home. They came with the place when we bought it. But until I can find exactly what I'm looking for to replace them, the only way they look great is pulled up so the windows can shine.

Want to play along? Visit www.fatmumslim.com.au for all the details

Dear Robbers: You Suck!

**I would like to apologise now for the level of profanity in this post. The day I get my hands on the shits who did this, I will be sure to invoke my rage upon them, and not blog it.**

As the title would indicate, we were robbed this week.  Yep, that's right.  Robbed.  Swindled.  Pillaged.

If it wasn't bolted down, they flogged it. The fuckers.

The list of what's gone is too long, but let's just say that the material side can be sorted out.  The sentimental value of some special items, however, is something that those assholes have taken and insurance can't replace.

The necklace that my grandmother gave me before she died, that her mother got for her 21st, that my grandmother got for her 21st and then passed it on to me when I turned 21. Made in the early 1900's and gifted to me in the ivory stud box that belonged to my great-grandfather, none of it can be replaced.

Least of all the heritage and value in my heart.

The necklace and earrings that belonged to my other grandmother, made in singapore, they are real, miniature orchids dipped in gold.

She loved them and, when my grandfather gave them to me after my grandmother died, it was a very special moment I'll never forget.

And while these complete and total dickwads can't take the memories, it's the thought of those worthless, miserable, fuckwit's having their filthy hands on something that represents so much love and history in our family.

Those items would have been passed on to our daughter on her 21st birthday. But those fuckers have taken that from us too.

I just can't believe it's gone. That there are pricks in the world that do this kind of shit.

It's all gone.

The jewellry that the Guru gave me for our first Christmas together. The necklace and earrings I wore on our wedding day that were a gift from my parents, and the Pandora bracelet with the charms the Guru gave me as a wedding gift, which also included charms from when the Toddler was born.

The video camera that had the only copy of footage from our wedding, which was our first dance. Trust me, I'm kicking myself that in 3 years I didn't find the time to take the movie from the camera and save it somewhere safe.

I'm so pissed. At them. At myself.

Because I thought I was clever putting all my important items of jewellry together, in a box that was hidden in a drawer I thought no one would look in.  I had another jewellry box in plain sight that I thought robbers would take and be done with.

And they could have it - there wasn't anything important in it.

It all pisses me off so much.  The Guru is blaming himself - he feels like he's failed the Toddler and I in not protecting us better.  But that's not something that even entered my head!  At the end of the day, they wanted to get in and pinch stuff. So they did.

No amount of anything would have stopped them.

In fact the only solution I can think of is to get a BIG dog with BIG teeth, and install an electric fence.

20,000 volts should do it.

I keep drifting between rage and sadness. Between acceptance and disbelief.  Between safe and scared.

I hate that they've made me feel nervous - IN OUR OWN HOME. How dare they! Who the fuck do they think they are!?

Are you so fucking useless you can't get a job? Can't earn money honestly? Because my husband and I, do. We go to work every day and earn every cent. Our taxes probably pay for the dole money that keeps you going between robberies.

We worked hard to buy a home. To fill it with love and safety and comfort.

We did not do it all just so you could come in and fuck off with it.

How DARE you come into OUR home and act like you own the place. How DARE you come into OUR home and poison the atmosphere with your fucking useless presence.

But we won't let you win. Oh no - you might feel like you've got the upper hand now, but trust me. It will all catch up with you.

And when it does, I hope I'm there to see it.

Days Two through Five

Saturday 23 April

Today was so exciting that three days later I can't actually remember what we did. Wait - I think we might have...gone...somewhere...for food.

Awesome.


Sunday 24 April

So today is Easter Egg day. Well, I won't deny that I postponed the egg-stravaganza until as late in the day as possible. How, you ask? By spring cleaning. And I mean right down to scrubbing the walls with sugar soap, dragging everything into the laundry that I could possibly fit into the washing machine and if it wasn't nailed down it was shoved aside for vacuuming and mopping.

A full day of this and I wasn't even 50% finished. Our house isn't that big - I'm just in anal-retentive mode.

We then proceeded to my parents house for dinner and an Easter egg hunt. It was a hit and I was stunned by the lack of chocolate-want-but-can't-have tantrums.

The Guru found time in his busy schedule of relaxation and stupid, boring, boy activities to say hello via Skype. He mentioned a lot of things but the one thing that really sticks in my mind is that he's had a massage one or twice a day, every day since he got there.

Insert sobbing here.

We got home and passed out. Yay for sleep. It's the closest thing I'll get to a massage around here.

Monday 25 April

Spent the morning doing some more cleaning. I found that scrubbing things, very hard, made me feel better. Less rage-y about the lack of Balinese massage therapists in my house.

Then, after a marathon nap for the Toddler (3 and a half hours!) it was time for her play date. We went to our friends house and swam in the pool, made the most of the pool slide, played on their bouncy castle/ball pit thing, played some snooker and even went as far as attempting some SingStar.

I'm ashamed to say that when The Cardigans, Nickelback and Natalie Imbruglia came on I was in my element. It brought back many memories of singing into hairbrushes.

After a fab dinner of pork belly with crackling that the neighbours could hear you chewing on and all the SingStar we decided to head home. Our children had long since passed into the world of sleep. And we got home around 1am.

Seriously, it's the latest night I've had since I found out I was pregnant. That wasn't home based or baby related.

Today, Tuesday 26 April

More cleaning. Yeah, I'm so not done. It's hard - once you start doing something properly it's really disappointing to do a half arsed finish. Especially when you know you'll most likely have to clean it again in five minutes because your child and/or pet will have destroyed your efforts.

I did some more washing. I think my washing machine will be going on strike shortly. The TV in our bedroom has died. It made some scary noises and then smoke and sparks started in the back.

I initially thought it might have been an extreme protest to having to play In The Night Garden. For the eight hundredth time.

But no, it did the same when I tried to play something worthwhile. I toyed with the idea of contacting the Guru to tell him that one of his treasured technological items has bitten the dust. But I decided against it for fear of having to hear more about massages. I knew it would only make make me get stabby.

So, instead - I stood in my loungeroom and looked around. As a result I was very unhappy with the view and so I am taking it upon myself to completely change it while the Guru is away and not here to whinge.

This does mean making a slight change in the TV department - specifically, taking it off the wall and relocating it. This could cause may tears from the Guru as, when he hung it on the wall for the first time, he almost fell to his knees at his newly created altar of viewing pleasure.

With our not exactly wonderful room shape (an L shaped area) that needs to incorporate our lounge area, dining area and some play space for the Toddler, I was in a bit of a pickle as to the floor plan.

This is our living/dining area - our front door is at the top of the wall directly behind the couch. The white empty space at the bottom is where our kitchen is and we have 2 doors exactly as indicated on the lower part of the diagram.

After some thinking and some Googling I think I've found a solution, and it'll look something like this:

Obviously this is just to give you an idea, I'll have to 'flip' this pic to adapt it to our place...I'm hoping it'll work!

 I've most likely set myself a ridiculous task and I'm not even sure if it's do-able. It could be a complete disaster!

But hey, what have I got to lose? Maybe a couple of finger/toenails at worst. Lifting heavy furniture has its risks.

They say a change is as good as a holiday.

I don't know about that just yet - let me get back to you when I'm done.

It's oh so quiet

It's been a bit quiet on here this past week or so.

Not sure why, but my blog mojo just hasn't been flowing. I have plenty of things I could blog about, but the need/want just isn't there.

It's been a full week, that's for sure. Starting with Saturday and the Guru's Dad having another heart attack. His second since December, and he only had his bypass done in February.

It's scary. 2 more arteries that are blocked. More surgery. The feeling of uncertainty.

And while they may seem petty and insignificant compared to the above, other things that happened this week are:

• We are so super proud of our amazing little girl who is now toilet trained during the day. It's like she just woke up one morning and decided it was time. If only everything was that easy.
• We sold the blue car. I hugged it goodbye and left it to the mercy of Hyundai - it's birthplace. In return for some cold, hard cash.
• We put money in our savings account. And didn't take it out again 3 minutes later to buy some frivolous, pointless item (although the Guru has been eyeing off bigger and better TV's. I told him we can have one once we build a wall sturdy enough to hold the monstrosity he wants to own.)
• I threw a tanty and so now we are purchasing a dishwasher BEFORE the Guru goes on holiday.
• I stared blankly at the back wall of our house wondering where the hell we would fit another baby if a miracle occured and I fell pregnant before the next ice age/house extension is done.
• I continued to stare blankly at the back wall of our house - willing it to magically extend and making the need for builders and having to pay them completely unnecessary. For the record, it just stared back. Bastard.
• I then stared at the front steps of our home (which are still 'the steps of death' connected to the 'deck of death') and willed them to fall off so the Guru has to do something about it.
• I realised that the Guru will not be doing anything house related (such as replace the 'deck of death' so I or our daughter don't go head first down the stairs. Again.) over this extra long and awesome break - because he will be on holiday.
• I continued to be convinced that kicking him in the groin would make me feel better that he will be holidaying without us.
• To add insult to injury - while he was going on a holiday I at least had the pleasure of knowing that I would be hooning around in our new computer with wheels (aka: car). But now Mitsubishi tell me they only just put the car in transit from Melbourne to Adelaide today. And then it will be shipped here, but it will be shipped here in the first week of May. Maybe. Insert sobbing here.
• I discovered I want to kick Mitsubishi in the groin.
• A life sized model of myself made entirely out of chocolate will make me feel better - for as long as it takes to eat it. Then most likely I'll feel sick.

So, there you have it. What we've been up to.

Looks like I did want to blog after all.

Entry in the May DP Blog Carnival at SuperParents

I fell down the stairs this morning

Yep, I did. Smack bang right down the front steps.

I've been whinging to the Guru for months how the decking at the top of the stairs needs looking at because it's slippery, and when it rains (like, ALL THE TIME) it only makes it worse.

I feel now I have done everything I can to prove my point. Including doing a shite 'Evil Knievil' impression on my way down the stairs. Sadly, I didn't land on my feet. Well, I did, but they were up around my face. One of them, anyway.

I called the Guru and screeched something about needing to book time in his diary to discuss renovations. Because otherwise I'm going home this afternoon to burn the house down in a rage*. After I've seen my GP.



* Dear Insurance Company - if my house burns down in the (near) future, it totally wasn't me and you will need to pay for us to build a new home. Without a shitty, slippery deck. And by the way, our new Ferrari was in the drive at the time, and it contained the new 60 inch plasma screen I just picked up from The Good Guys.

Dear Darwin

Dear Darwin,

Hey - how are you? Sorry it's been a while since we've caught up properly, but I've been swamped with blogging work.

So what's happening? It's all go for us at the moment with life in general, and I've decided that 2011 is going to be the year I add one more thing to my plate.

I want to study. I've been putting off my nursing since 2008 - remember that? Remember when I was putting the finishing touches on my final assignment for anatomy and counting down the last 20 days to my wedding?

Remember how excited I was to be working towards my career at last, since year 12 sucked the life out of me? Do you?

Well, apparently you don't remember well enough because now you've stopped offering my course. Just like that. Nope, sorry, not doing that anymore.

Considering you have only ONE university, that's pretty poor. I came to you from Adelaide...Adelaide has THREE universities. But none of them offer my course via distance learning (jerks).

You're doing this on purpose, aren't you? Is it because we cut down all those trees on the weekend? To be fair, most of those had come down in the cyclone - so you need to speak to the low pressure system, not me. But what can I say - my Dad had a chainsaw and I had a vision. And we will now have a kick-arse lawn area for the Toddler and her swing set.

I mean, we put up with your disgusting house prices, the revolting cost of living and the complete lack of decent shopping opportunities - and for what!?

Admittedly, I might be additionally dis-enchanted with you today because the builder got back to us with some seriously awesome and dreamy diagrams of our renovations. But then I came crashing down to earth when I saw the price tag (because I always, conveniently forget that these things have to be paid for).

And I am blaming it all on you Darwin.

Because you are expensive, inconvenient, hot, humid, damp, palm-tree-frond-dropping-ly annoying and full of people who drive 20km's an hour under the speed limit in front of me on a one lane road.

I've developed a new road rule for the NT. I came up with it this morning as I was driving to work, stuck behind the slowest person on earth. Part of the standard driving test will now require you to do a race track lap against The Stig. If you can't get your car to do 0-100km/hr in under 4 seconds and complete your lap (approximately 2.83 km, or 1.76 miles) in under 1min 40sec then your car gets crushed and you have to catch the bus.

So not only have you made me want to run everyone off the road and possibly get myself arrested (only if they catch me!), you've also tried to take away my future and crush my dreams of having a house of bliss.

Is it not bad enough that when I looked in the mirror yesterday morning I found crows feet!? I'm only 27, and yet I'm starting to look like The Emperor.


This is me first thing in the morning, before coffee. Credit

 Thanks for that.

I am now desperately trying to catch that advert on telly about the snake venom cream which will paralyze my face and reverse the ageing process.

This is preferable to popping down to Hair Dude and getting some Botox with a cut and colour. I wish I was joking.

But no - you keep up with the rain so the satellite Austar link dies off and I miss my opportunity to order snake spit in a jar.

It's not fair and I want it all to change. Today. Okay?

So anyway, it was great to catch up and I'll be sure to keep an eye on your progress with the changes we've discussed above.

Hope you had a fab weekend, and say hi to Bali for me.

Love Me
x

Christmas Joy

Oh yeah - December 1 rolled around and I was on the tree like a rabid possum on roadkill.

I took about sixy shots of the tree - and none of them are good enough. The flash was all wrong, I flicked every light in the general area on and off in different combinations to try and get the prettiness of the lights, but still see the decorations properly.

Basically my skills and my camera were just not up to the task.

And one day, I will fix one or both of these problems.

So for now - I reveal to you the first Xmas Tree in OUR OWN HOME...

Adequate lighting to see the tree - but not the 150 fairy lights!

Twinkle, twinkle little light...

My best effort...is a bit rubbish

The Toddler now enjoys turning on the lights at night, and is thrilled that the Guru decided to put lights on the house this year.

That's becase the Guru is suffering from light envy.

Light envy occurs once a year when a member of your household see's someone in your street (or suburb in our case, because we don't just compete with our street apparently...) with a magnificent display of Christmas Joy in the form of lights.

Lucky for us, we have the Griswold's living in our suburb this year. For those who are unfamiliar with this family, please observe the following:



Image from here



Image from here

Now you have some idea of the insane level of Chrismtas Light magic we're up against. Needless to say I sleep with my sunglasses on due to the light level in our town not dropping below eye-searing.

The Guru insists that he does not have Light Envy. I beg to differ. Because driving past, screaming 'I will beat you, Griswold-type family!' and then proceeding to speed to Bunnings to buy Christmas lights says to me you have more problems than you're willing to admit. One being mild insanity - the other being Light Envy.

So far we have some coloured solar lights in a tree, and some icicle type lights hanging above one side of the carport.

The Guru has a week off this week - and I'm anticipating I'll arrive home to our own eye-searing extravaganza, and Power & Water will be rubbing their grubby hands together thinking of all the zero's they'll be adding to our bill in the New Year.

I might just sell that kidney now before it get's destroyed by Christmas alcoholism joy.

The Toddler is also thrilled that this time of year comes with a magic box that opens once a day and delivers a small chocolate.

To the un-initiated, this is also known as an Advent Calendar.

The Guru and I may or may not have one each. And we may or may not be waiting for 24 December so we can sit down and just scoff 24 chocolates all at once.

Ah Christmas - it just brings out the best in our family.

Reality Blogging

Behold! The Hole! Kitchen!

Home to the dumped bag, and dirty dish.

I am a dishwasher girl. But in my guilt over leaving our rental before our lease was up I left our Fisher & Paykel 2 drawer Dishdrawer set behind as a peace offering.

Regret is about 9 on a scale of 1-10. And that's only because I do find it good to think I'm saving a bit of water by washing dishes by hand. But I live in a state where it rains almost non stop for 6 months of the year...what the hell am I worrying about water for!?

I also hate the kitchen. And I am hoping in the next 12 months we will be doing the kitchen reno's (and the bathroom...but shhhh - I haven't filled in the Guru on that bit just yet) and then the strange blue/green cupboards will be demolished, the cooker can be turfed and the tiles - well, I think I might try and burn them simply out of disgust. The splashback tiling isn't even something my Nanna would have picked out! And who lays crap, brown tiles over perfectly gorgeous wooden floors!?

It also means extending that side of the house about 5 feet...so YAY for extra space!

But enough of my rambling. You've now witnessed the horror that is my kitchen.

In my dreams this is what I cook in...

crsremodel.com

But a bit more modern styling - with features and doors etc from a kitchen like this...

aviewondesign.blogspot.com

Oh dream kitchen - you are wonderful and some day you just might find your way into my home.

But for now I'd settle for a dishwasher.


This is linked to Reality Blogging, hosted by Bad Mummy

Settlement Baby, YEAH!

It's official! We now own our home! Angels are singing on high and I think there may be a meteor shower in celebration.

And thank god the banks decided to get their shit together and finalise it all. Because as exciting as painting was, I was so UN-excited with the idea that if settlement got delayed any further the vendors would pull out and we'd have to be painting everything white again and putting that evil 'For Sale' sign back in the front yard.

And so we enter the next phase of our lives. As home owners. Gardeners. Renovators. Developers. DIY'ers. Oh, I am so looking forward to rocking up to Bunnings covered in dirt/paint/wood shavings/decking oil etc and walking through looking for the 'stuff' we need. To being one of those people who I always envied at sauntering through Bunnings and getting the gear for THEIR home. The one they OWNED.

Well, kiss my grits people because we are now one of you! And while we are still refining our DIY skills, we can smash holes in walls and plant things in garden beds with the best of 'em.

But most of all I am stoked because we finally got the layout of the longe/dining area sorted. And I'm sorry - but there is no way I was going to start packing again after it's taken me a week to finally get it right.

Who knew that finding the perfect spot for the dining table would be such an exhausting task...

The rose coloured glasses are smashed in my driveway...

So it appers that moving into your new home allows you to scrutinize the external appearance a bit more than you did when you first looked. Even though you paid to have someone do a building and structural report to bring your attention to anything you might have glossed over in your enthusiasm to enter the property market. Even though you read said report and you know, deep down, that you glossed over the imprefections this stranger found.

And it would also appear that painting walls within your new home allows you to scrutinize the internal appearance a bit more. So much so, that once you have finished painting you hurry back to Bunnings to assess the cost of a new toilet suite, new shower head, new doors and handles, new curtains and/or blinds and new kitchens. Plus discussing intensely how a full bathroom renovation could be pulled off in the 24hrs before all your stuff is delivered by the removalist company.

The Guru informs me that a full bathroom renovation will absolutely not be possible in 24hrs, no matter how many 1hr makeover shows I've watched and no matter how many famous 'handy-man' type people from renovation shows I might theoretically be able to con into coming around and doing it. Because they won't apparently. Not unless one of us gets an incurable, life ending medical condition. And to be honest, a bathroom renovation isn't worth that.

So I've had to settle for painting. For now. But I have to say, the colours that have gone up are AMAZING! And can I just say, having a father-in-law who is a painter/decorator by trade is a fantastic thing to have and the paint job is A1 Professional Grade, baby!

So our bedroom has a feature wall of Taubman's 'Rumble' which is a deep purple colour. The Toddler scored a feature wall of Taubman's 'Cheeky' which is a bright, hot pink. Her other walls will be painted in Taubman's 'Celeste' which is a super, light, pale baby pink and the whole room will be a little girl's paradise! The lounge room has a feature wall of Taubman's 'Desert Spice' which is a burnt orange colour with a bit of brightness in there to make the room 'pop'. And with the poliched floor boards the lounge looks so warm and inviting that a fireplace wouldn't be out of place. Highly inappropriate and pointless given the climate here, but it would be a perfect centrepiece. I'm told that the plasma screen going up on the wall will be the perfect centrepiece.

I'm reserving my judgement...

The remainder of our walls are plain white, but we'll most likely be re-painting these with a more classic light, creamy white...but we'll have to wait and see. The Guru and I are still in negotiations.

One thing we do agree on is to get the loo and the front and back doors replaced as soon as we can. And I'm thinking the front balcony decking could do with jazzing up a bit...not to mention the polished floor borads inside. But I am genuinely thinking of trying to convince the Guru that carpet in the bedrooms would be so completely lovely. I miss carpet in the bedroom. I miss that gorgeous sinking feeling of a good quality, soft and luxurious carpet. That warm, cosy feeling that only carpet can give.

What can I say - there is a part of me that wants to have a small luxury in our home. And that's some super, sexy, luxurious, cosy carpet. Once a bedroom carpet girl, always a bedroom carpet girl.

And no, a rug is NOT the same. No matter how many times the Guru might tell me it is, it's not. End of story.

But I'd like to know - what is it about owning a property that gives you this sudden impression that you are a DIY God and can do anything and everything? Right down to plumbing!? Even though you have no idea what the idfference between a U-bend and an S-bend is, or that there is actually a tool called a Monkey Wrench and it's not just the topic of a (brilliant) Foo Fighter's song!

I'm certain the Guru will be locking up any tools and potential tools so when I'm home alone I am unable to embark on my own DIY projects. It's most likely a very sensible act that I would highly endorse. Because I seriously don't know my Monkey Wrench from my S-bend.

The tragic thing now is that if I stuff it up - we have to pay for the repairs...

And it's at this point that having a husband in the insurance business is suddenly so much more valuable than it was a week ago. Maybe I'll just stick to painting - I can see the results being far less depression-inducing than a DIY bathroom reno.

No matter how fabulous I think I could make it.

Friday the 13th was delaying the inevitable...

And as a result, today is turning out to be crap-tacular!

We're supposed to be moving in to our new house this week. SUPPOSED to be. And due to circumstances beyond our control settlement has been delayed. We're hoping no longer than a week, but there are no guarantees.

And we have to be out of the house we currently rent by the end of this week.

On the bright side, the Toddler is LOVING sleeping on her mattress on the floor (as we dismantled all the beds and things last night in preparation for the move). She bounces on her mattress and laughs like a looney, and seems to think she is oh, so big and clever being able to get out of her bed all by herself and run to Mummy and Daddy's room and jump on our mattress and laugh even harder. Actually, I might watch the video I took on my phone. Her laugh always makes me feel better...

I should have known this was coming. The weekend went waaaaaay too well, and Friday was SPECTACULAR considering it was Friday the 13th. I should have known. Now I look back, everything was way too good. I managed to find the new mobile I've wanted for a while at a great price and they had the colour I wanted in stock. I found 3 pairs of fabulous shoes for the Toddler. And a dress. The Guru actually volunteered to take me out shopping on the Saturday to get away from boxes and we ate lunch out and had a great day together as a family.

Well, the fun was nice while it lasted...

So our stuff is still being picked up by the movers on Wednesday - but rather than going to our nice, freshly painted home they'll be staying in a shipping container in a warehouse until we get the keys.

And then I call Le Cornu to mention this problem to them and ask if they can hold our new couches for another week or so. Nope - they're CLOSING their warehouse and so have nowhere to keep them. So we have to come and pick it up as soon as possible. Oh, and the new 'big girl bed' we bought for the Toddler, that we back ordered to come in around October - well that's here too with the mattress. In the warehouse that they're closing. That if we don't pick our stuff up they'll start charging us a disgusting fee to keep it there as they'll have to keep the warehouse open as long as there's stuff in there. And we'll wear the cost of that.

What was it about 'please don't order/deliver until October' on the paperwork was so difficult to understand? It's on our copy! And they printed it off, so presumably it's on their system...

It feels like today couldn't get any worse if it tried. But then again, they say bad luck comes in 3's so we have 1 more to go today.

Oh joy...I can't wait to see what the universe has in store for us now.

The 3 of us should have just piled in to our bed together and hid under the covers reading books...it would have been much safer.

Day of Awesome-ness!!

So today was proof that when a good day arrives, it arrives with it's possie in tow...

Okay, so I was late to work which was a bit of a bummer, but I didn't mind. In fact I hardly gave it a thought! And arriving at work I had to head into a staff meeting. Thankfully I'd brewed coffee at home and had it ready to go. I'm sorry, I can't have a meeting before 10am without copious amounts of coffee. Not if you want a reply that makes sense. Otherwise I'm quite happy to provide you with a load of nonsense about fluffy bunnies when you ask me about the budget ratio of training from 2009 to 2010.

On the bright side the meeting lasted 30 minutes. It was a record I may not live to see again. A bit like Hayley's Comet...and I do believe a small piece of hell froze over this morning as our CEO wrapped it up. Halleleuja.

I powered through work and finally decided to have my lunch break just after 2pm...wandered down to the local cafe and ordered. It was amazing but I scored the last croissant and the last banana caramel muffin. And if you had tried one of these muffins you would know why I would mug an old lady just to get one. Maybe. If she hasn't taken a bite out of it first.

So, ordered, paid and waiting for my toasted croissant to come out. And waiting. And waiting a little bit more. And then some more. And finally a small voice calls over the tables and mentioned something about flaming croissants and would I be interested in a toasted sandwich instead? Hey, why not. As long as it has ham and cheese I'm good to go.

The sandwich arrives, it smells lovely and I happily take it from the waiter. Who then hands me the cost of my croissant back. They refunded me because I had to wait. NICE!! Score $6.50 for me!!

Wandering back to work now with my sandwich, muffin and drink. Delivery person is dropping off some mags to a business. And gives me a free copy!! Woohoo!

Continuing on my way, work for the rest of the day is breezy and then it's hometime.

Earlier in the day I made the decision to temp to see if it helps with our TTC journey. And I managed to find a chemist in Darwin that has the thermometer I'm looking for. Head there after work and grab one so I can start temping in the morning. YEAH! Score one for TTC!!

I managed to contact the Salvo's about the couch we'd like to give them, which was our good deed for the week. It's nice to have one of those every now and then - even if earlier in the week you had no intention of doing anything that would mean you had a couch to give away...until you walked into Le Cornu and decided to pre-spend some of your tax refund!But moving on from that impulse buy...

The inspection of the house we currently rent went very well this morning and hopefully it will be rented out not long after we leave which means it will be easier on our friends. But it also means we can move up settlement on our new home and as a result will be moving in 2 weeks. Which is awesome, if not completely scary with how much packing we have to do between now and then! But completely worth the inevitable packing meltdown (I'm scheduling mine for the day before we move - so nobody call on Sunday 15 August because I'll be crying into boxes).

All in all it's been a fab day - had Chinese for dinner courtesy of the in-laws (YUM!) and am now contentedly thinking of finshing this up and heading for bed.

I sincerely hope my good mood and good luck continue for a while - at least until we've finished moving house! After that, anything goes - and if it's bad, it goes out the door...

Welcome to the world of debt - please, sit down, you'll be here for a while...

Well, I'm back after my small melt down last week. The concept of stupid people and dodgy parents got me down and I needed some down time to get back to myself and remember why it is that everything is worth..well..everything.

And so the day has arrived - the day when we're signing our lives (souls) away to the bank for a piece of the Australina Dream. Our own home.

At 4pm today I'll be scribbling ink on a wad of paper that will own us. And I'm not afraid to say that I am just a teeny bit scared. Scared of stuffing it all up.

Because when you default on rent, it doesn't feel too bad. You're only depriving your greedy landlord of some cash in the short term. And let's face it - if they can afford a rental property in today's market - they ain't poor people!! But a mortgage where they'll take everything you own, including your knickers to get their money back. Well - that's just a whole new level of 'holy crap'.

The Guru is somewhat shit scared too. So scared that he's prepared to give up smoking so we always know we have enough money to pay for our home. Fair enough (although concerning that he believes he smokes enough to spend a mortgage repayment!). Not an unwelcome result - I've been whinging at him for years to give up. If I had known all it would take was a shite load of debt - hell, I would have tried harder to spend more time in Myer!!

But I get the feeling that the same terrifying loyalty to debt repayment wouldn't count if it was the result of a terrible shoe/perfume/make-up/clothing/accessory spending binge. Which is sad.

And yet, you can't live in a shoe, or a perfume bottle or in a handbag. So the house really does deserve all this dedication. Although if someone said to me I could live in a pair of Manolo Blahnik's, I think my life would be complete...almost.

And it is with that thought that I leave this and pack up to start the next chapter of our lives. And yes, while it's not a Manolo Blahnik house, it's even better than that. Because I'll be living in it with my own little family - and they make me complete.

And then there was silence...

Well, I'm silent anyway. Much to the Guru's delight I might add. Tonsillitis - thou art mine enemy.

But on a brighter note, we have signed the contract and we are almost owners of our first home! A bit late, some people might say, to be getting one now. You should have done this when you were 21 (because at the moment I'm feeling old and decrepit at 26), not married and with no children. Well pooh on you. If you live in Darwin you'll know that trying to buy here requires a signed deal with the devil and the bank (one and the same at times), and that's just to go look! And more importantly, if you spend a lot of time looking at other states and comparing prices you'll be like us, lamenting the amount of money they ask here for the (questionable) quality of the home. But we've struck gold, and have done very well. Pats on the back all 'round!!

I'm excited, the Guru's excited and so is the Toddler. Hooray for us!