Sometimes I need a filter between my brain and my mouth.
This is not the way to get one.

Wednesday, 2 January 2013

2013...

Well 2012, you were a good year. Hell, you were amazing! In the grand scheme of things, there are few years that can match you. 2008, 2009 and 2012 will always be hard to beat. 2013 will have to work hard to top you - she's already being weighed down by some large facts...

1. There will be no new babies born this year (to us! The rest of the world is free to procreate)
2. The Man has put his foot down and said no more babies for us.
3. The Man said no more babies!
4. There is a part of me that agrees with him...
5. There is a part of me that doesn't...
6. The Man is booking in for a vasectomy, so there's no going back.

I suppose it's the finality of it all - there will seriously, never, ever be another child born to us, and a part of my heart is heavy for that. I'm sure every mother in the world has a small part of them that's never sure if they are 100% done with birthing babies - especially when you consider how amazing, cute, squishy and yummy smelling they are.

I'll make my peace with it, I'm sure. Probably around the time JellyBean begins eating like her sister and the weekly shop increases 1000%.

It brings the end of baby clothes and the painful experience of having to give them away/sell them, along with furniture. When that time comes I'll probably have to be sedated while The Man deals with it.

However, as much as 2013 brings the end to some phases of our lives, it does herald the beginning of others. Miss 3 will be Miss 4 in exactly 17 days time and will begin pre-school this year. She will wear a uniform, learn so many things and come home smarter than me on day 1. She will become even more independent and I will have to learn to let go. But not that much.

JellyBean will grow like a weed and I will find a corner of my bedroom to curl into the foetal position and rock back and forth each night, crippled by the fact that my girls are growing every second of every day.

It will bring further renovations and improvements to the house, more gardening and swearing at the palm-trees-from-hell in our yard that insist on spreading their dead fronds as far as the eye can see. It will see me plotting their demise in the form of a tree lopping service and a wood chipper!

I will turn...sob...29. But so will The Man.

It may see my frame shrink further - or perhaps increase - you never can tell. I'll just hope for the best and try not to spend too much time down the chocolate aisle in Coles.

It will be my first solid year as a SAHM and I plan to delve into the world of domestic goddess-ness and the culinary arts. Well, culinary arts is probably a bit ambitious - I'd settle for learning not to burn water.

I may find the time to read a book. And maybe get to see a movie at the cinema. I'll continue to forget how bitter the skins are on fresh plums and eat one.

We will watch rain storms roll in, cuddle our babies when they shy away from the flashes of lightning and cracks of thunder and let them sleep between us to feel safe. We will jump on trampolines, swim in pools, play at parks, rock babies to sleep, run baths, put little bodies in jim-jams, take a million and one photo's, laugh, cry, whinge, moan and complain about something-or-other and fall asleep at night, grateful to be able to do it every day.

2013 may not be the year of births in our home, but it certainly will be the year of awesome.

Long may it reign...




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